Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
