They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Randomize
