Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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