So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
