I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
