He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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