I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
