She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
