I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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