That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Thank you for not boning my boss.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
