so that wasnt chicken after all
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
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