i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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