let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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