I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
And then my night got REAL pukey
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
