Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
