Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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