when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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