I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
