Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
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