I think i peed on brittanys purse
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
