Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
it glows. i had to have it.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌