shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize