Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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