and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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