our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
