Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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