I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
