somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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