i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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