do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
