So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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