Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
