She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
