my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
