my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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