I CAN MOONWALK!
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
