Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
