yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Randomize
