I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
