Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize