Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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