Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
