If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Randomize
