Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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