After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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