My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
