Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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