We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize