Walk of Shame. In a state park.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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