He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
